KATE MONSTER:
I wish I could go back to college.
Life was so simple back then.

NICKY:
What would I give to go back and live in a dorm with a meal plan again!

PRINCETON:
I wish I could go back to college.
In college you know who you are.
You sit in the quad, and think, “Oh my God!
I am totally gonna go far!”

ALL:
How do I go back to college?
I don’t know who I am anymore!

PRINCETON:
I wanna go back to my room and find a message in dry-erase pen on the door!
Ohhh…
I wish I could just drop a class…

NICKY:
Or get into a play…

KATE MONSTER:
Or change my major…

PRINCETON:
Or fuck my T.A.

ALL:

I need an academic advisor to point the way!
We could be…
Sitting in the computer lab,4 A.M. before the final paper is due,
Cursing the world ’cause I didn’t start sooner,
And seeing the rest of the class there, too!

PRINCETON:
I wish I could go back to college!

ALL:
How do I go back to college?!
AHHHH…

PRINCETON:
I wish I had taken more pictures.

NICKY:
But if I were to go back to college,
Think what a loser I’d be–
I’d walk through the quad,
And think “Oh my God…”

ALL:
“These kids are so much younger than me.”